ProWomanProLife

I’m not ignoring this story, doing the rounds, I promise, showing that there are no negative mental health effects after abortion. I just feel like with a topic as political as this one, I should read the study before I link to it and have some commentary on what they did or did not do.

I have not yet had the time to do so. But I will say this: This study flies in the face of a great number of other studies indicating precisely the opposite. And I will also add that all those other studies showing abortion does indeed harm a woman’s mental health did not get the press this one is getting.

My beef is with the media for quickly picking up on this story, while concealing other studies that show the opposite outcome. They think they are being “feminist” or woman-friendly by reporting this story, because they are “pro-choice” but in fact what they are doing has quite the opposite effect. Since so many women do indeed suffer after their abortions, this type of press tells them their suffering is unwarranted and that there is something wrong with them for feeling bad.

This is not to say that every woman feels bad after an abortion. Some don’t. But for every one woman who doesn’t, there’s a defensive woman who, quite frankly, hasn’t quite processed what she’s done, and then there are, of course, those who truly do feel bad and suffer suicide, suicide ideation, increased drug and alcohol use, etc.

I’m sure we could get to a point where no woman ever felt bad about her abortion. This is fully possible. But is it desirable? Would this not mean a distancing from our own selves? A truly clinical approach to something so intimate and personal is not the direction we want to go. I’m not asking for women to feel bad, no. I’m asking for them to be empowered enough that they wouldn’t make the decisions that leave them with lousy decisions in the first place.

All of these ideas on what it means to be a truly strong woman, one who is confident, bold, assertive and makes good decisions as a result is whispering into the wind when it comes to the media who are stuck on the notion that apparently there is an “undo” button for sex. Which there isn’t. Sex isn’t a recreational activity–therefore the outcomes of poor choices–babies or killing said babies–aren’t recreational either. A lack of poor mental health after killing your baby is possible, but wholly undesirable. When we truly reach that stage where studies return this outcome based on good research methodology, we’ll have a lot more than abortion to worry about.

I posted about Steve Jobs and the fact that he was adopted earlier, here.

Here’s a video of him introducing the Macintosh in 1984 for the first time.

Rest in peace.

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Andrea adds: This is worth watching too.

Praying for this family today:

…that’s when I tend to think we are in deep trouble.

We shouldn’t be able to walk over homeless people sleeping in the streets and not find it troubling. We shouldn’t be able to just walk by “all-night massage parlours–open late!” featuring seductive photos of Asian women and not feel a twang of conscience. And we shouldn’t be able to walk by an abortion clinic and not know what is going on there. So that’s why you should definitely read this post.

Recently, the pro-life community in Canada has been upset by the discovery that up to 17 weeks of leave are granted to women after an abortion. Now, one’s initial reaction might be that this is crazy. What on earth does a woman need 17 weeks for if there is no baby?

But this is where we in the pro-life community know better.

We know, for example, that abortion not only mars the life of an unborn child but that of the woman as well. Abortion causes physical and emotional damage, and this requires recovery.

Almost 10% of mental health problems are directly linked to abortion. Women with a history of abortion experience an 81% increase in the risk of mental health problems compared to women who had not had an abortion. The study also reveals that, post-abortion, the increased risk for anxiety disorders was 34%; for depression, 37%; for alcohol abuse, 110%; for marijuana abuse, 220%, and for suicidal behaviour, 155%.

We also know that coming to terms with abortion is a grieving process.

So, while it may seem ludicrous on the surface, I think this policy might actually give us room for hope and growth. I’m aware not everyone will agree with me (you can call me a nutty optimist), but we do agree that abortion isn’t “no big deal” and admitting the horrific act of abortion requires a recovery time acknowledges this.

Nearly half of all abortions are preformed on women whom have already had abortions. If used correctly, if counseling is offered by us, if we can help acknowledge the loss and the pain, 17 weeks might just be long enough to break the cycle.

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Andrea adds: I’m afraid I would put you in the nutty optimist camp. First of all, I’m not sure that women who have had abortions are even aware of this “loophole.” Secondly, while it is certainly true that women experience a decline in mental health after abortion, offering state-funded benefits to recover from this merely solidifies the idea that no matter what your choice is, no matter how terrible, we’ll help you out. There ought to be repercussions somewhere on the road–otherwise we are nurturing women into making bad choices. This is what state funds do, my opinion would be entirely different if private sources of charity were kicking in 17 weeks of help. At this point in Canada one of the best things pro-lifers can hope for is that the state stops funding what is a lifestyle choice. This means defunding the abortion procedure itself, and certainly not funding benefits afterwards.

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Jenn adds: I was thinking that as well, that women aren’t aware of this leave time, and that if they are they still wouldn’t take it. Taking 17 weeks off work means an explanation on the woman’s part (to family, friends, co-workers who will ask), something she probably doesn’t want to do. The women I know who have had abortions usually want to return back to their “normal life” straight away to avoid thinking too much about it.

The tragic shootings in Norway have the country mourning not only the lost lives of so many young people but also the loss of the people they could’ve become. More from The Guardian,

Lejla got involved in politics, convinced that words and not weapons were a way to make the world a better place.

That’s how the 17-year-old came to be on the island of Utøya last Friday when Anders Behring Breivik arrived dressed as a policeman with a pistol in his belt and a hunting rifle slung over his shoulder, telling the campers he was there to protect them following the bomb in Oslo – only to open fire over the course of 90 minutes, killing 68 people.

Lejla was attending the youth convention on Utøya as head of the Fredrikstad branch of Norway’s youth labour movement, Arbeidernes Ungdomsfylking, or AUF. On Thursday night she sat with friends around the campfire as they practised a pop song they hoped to perform for the rest of the group the following night. The performance never happened.

Now Lejla is missing, presumed dead at the bottom of the Tyrifjorden, just one of dozens of young activists tipped for the top of Norwegian politics who will never reach adulthood, let alone the Stortinget, Norway’s parliament.

Obama said it as best anyone can in response to such a devastating loss, “To the people of Norway- we are heartbroken by the tragic loss of so many people, particularly youth with the fullness of life ahead of them. No words can ease the sorrow but please know that the thoughts and prayers of all Americans are with the people of Norway, and that we will stand beside you every step of the way.”

This is the story of a couple undergoing infertility treatments at great cost, first in Montreal, then in New York, only to get pregnant “the old-fashioned way.” So it’s a success story, in the end. I suppose I read it somewhat fearfully, thinking of all the broken relationships the result of the strain and cost of trying to conceive so desperately. Only to end up wondering whether you needed to do any of that in the first place.

Each woman is on her own journey. I don’t think mine will ever include invasive fertility treatments. It follows with my “some things are not a choice” philosophy. If it were to come to pass that I couldn’t have biological children I’d be forced to consider that there’s a reason for that. From time to time, when sadness hits because I don’t have any kids yet, I consider that maybe, just maybe, there might be even one child out there who was not aborted thanks to something I said or did. And then I consider all the great things I can do precisely because I don’t have my own kids. And then I call a friend with kids and listen to how she hasn’t slept since early January 2010 and the sadness pretty much dissapates.

Where was I? Fertility treatments. I have hesitated to comment too much on this precisely because it is so very emotional and personal, and I don’t want to hurt anyone experiencing infertility and going about solutions in their own way. But I do harbour some concerns about the manner in which we try to conceive, and this article highlights some of those.

This article is about still borns and how difficult it is. That is, of course, true. I just couldn’t help but think about all the aborted babies when I read this:

…[M]ost babies born still are quickly “disposed of” without being held, named or given a funeral. …These lives that will never be lived, this source of incalculable heartbreak, cries out for attention.

Babies disposed of. Incalculable heartbreak. Crying out for attention. Really? This from André Picard, the Globe and Mail health reporter who acted as a shill so that Morgentaler could get his Order of Canada.

I may be losing it a little (Brigitte! Come back!) but I can’t remember whether I posted this article I wrote for The Interim. It’s a bit of a review of that Australian book I so appreciated called Giving Sorrow Words:

Each woman is unique but two ideas unify the voices. The first is the myth that abortion is a neutral or easy choice. The second is that abortion is actually a choice.

So many women felt cheated because they could never have envisioned the aftermath. Stories are punctuated by comments like “I’ll never be forgiven for what I did.” Jasmine, from Melbourne, recounts her nightmares: “I dreamt I was covered in blood that would not wash off.” Marguerite, who describes herself as non-religious, writes “for many months after termination, I woke during the night to hear my baby screaming.” For her, the grief was “palpable” and “permeates waking and sleeping hours.”

The second myth is that abortion is a choice at all. Many women awaited their abortion appointment with dread. Justine called her long distance boyfriend on regular intervals, desperate for him to change his mind. He didn’t – until the after the abortion was done. She literally wandered hospital halls prior to her abortion searching for someone who would help her keep the child. Finding only a doctor who confirmed her worst fears that her boyfriend truly wasn’t interested, she went ahead. For Anne, her mother oversaw the unwanted abortion, coming afterwards with presents “like I’d had my tonsils out.” In another, the father, “stands over me while I ring to make the appointment.” Barbara also begged her husband to change his mind, “but all he did was hiss ‘get rid of it.’” While being wheeled to the operating room she plaintively asks: “won’t anyone save me?”

We can’t forget these stories, knowing that they are all too common and also knowing that young women out there are not hearing these voices.

Rachel’s Vineyard is having a retreat April 8-10 in the Ottawa area for any person who has struggled with the emotional or spiritual pain of abortion.

Check their web site for more information.