So this morning I went through airport security with a gift for my niece; a beautiful toy tea set in a basket, with napkins, plates and cutlery. She’s two. The gift goes through the X-ray machine, the security guard wants to take a look. I, not wanting to unwrap the gift, explain that yes, there are four knives in there (and four spoons, and four forks) but it’s a tea set for a two-year-old, and they are one inch long. He asks, “are they sharp?” To repeat: it’s a tea set for a two-year-old. He turned out to be really nice, has a daughter with whom he also has tea. They waved me through, tea set and all.
What could have been another ridiculous security-at-the-airport story has a good ending. Most unusual.








I got through airport security with a can once. I just honest to God forgot I had it in there. The guy stuck it back in my bag and told me to remember for next time.
A few years ago, I was on a Continental flight from Newark to Houston, and had a seat right behind the first class section. A young student was beside me, and the stewardess pulled the curtain between first class and us, the cheapies.
But not before we noticed that first class were given real cutlery to eat with, including metal knives. The student beside me said “what’s up with that?” and we concluded that terrorists could just pay the inflated fare and get their weapons given to them.
I got through 2 airports in the US with mace. Forgot it was on my keychain until I got to my destination and then I didn’t want to have to mail it home (wasn’t checking luggage) so I tried my luck and got through again. No one even questioned it! I certainly couldn’t have done anything horrible, but I could have caused plenty of trouble. Good thing I have no intention of being a trouble-maker! But how come 4 ounces of shampoo is questioned but not mace!?!?!
You must look so trustworthy and innocent!
I’ve gone through “weapons”, including a pocketknife on quite a few flights between the US and Canada. Although they did catch me with that USB drive and eye drops that one time. Oh my! But of course having the warped sense of thinking that I have, once I get through security I tend to sit around thinking about what I could turn into a weapon. You know, just in case the bad guys (or ninjas) show up. Like, I could rip apart my aluminium MacBook Pro and turn it into chinese stars and other shrapnel. Or use the pointy end of my hair comb to poke their eyes out. Or the one time I got to sit in first class on a business trip to Florida and they gave me a real glass? I could smash that on a seat and turn it into a sharp pointy object. I like to be prepared. Also, my hair is long enough to be braided into rope.
I think I might watch too many movies.
Deborah: If you ever need inspiration on how to turn your computer into a deadly device… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLbJ8YPHwXM
Brigitte: that was the best ever!