Here is a long but interesting article about paid surrogates in India, most of whose “clients” are Americans. There are so many thorny issues here. Is it possible that these women aren’t exploited, when they’re offered (by their standards) massive amounts of money? If we accept surrogacy for free, out of charity or love, is it wrong to pay for it? Are these western parents so desperate for a biological child somehow selfish for going this route instead of adopting one of the many children in the world who need loving parents? I don’t know the answer to any of these, but the whole operation seems very murky, and that’s without even addressing the “surplus” embryos that are inevitably created with IVF.
I can’t bring myself to condemn people who would do anything to have a child of their own, which for many people means one that shares their DNA. But this is an area in which some moral clarity, and consensus on what is and is not acceptable, would be very helpful.
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Andrea adds: Condemnation is never particularly helpful, no. But that is besides the point. If something is sketchy, murky or just plain wrong–we ought to call a spade a spade and say so. That might sound a lot like “condemnation” in moments. What is worse–a whiff of condemnation or in the case described above, making people into monetary transactions? I’m a sympathetic sort, I like to think–in particular to feeling like you really want kids. But there comes a point when our feelings really are besides the point–and wanting a child even very badly is, after all, just that. A feeling. (Does anyone ever feel (hardy har har) like our culture is grounded on nothing more than the latest Oprah show?)
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I am very glad to have the Catholic teaching as my guide in issues like this. One reason that Catholic teaching is against IVF and surrogacy is because there is no conjugal relation between the parents. Childen are the result of sexual intimacy between the mother and father. Having a child without the requisite relationship just brings people into murky situations like this.
And, certainly there are many children to be adopted, without insisting that one be a biological parent. The human heart has an incredible ability to love, and I think that people sell themselves short when they insist on having their own biological offspring, not realising that they can come to love another child immensely.
Once again, it is the adults’ wishes that are being fulfilled, while the child is being manipulated to fulfill those wishes. Childen are then commodities to be bought and sold and used for others’ purposes, no matter how altruistic those purposes may seem.
“I am very glad to have the Catholic teaching as my guide in issues like this. One reason that Catholic teaching is against IVF and surrogacy is because there is no conjugal relation between the parents. Childen are the result of sexual intimacy between the mother and father. Having a child without the requisite relationship just brings people into murky situations like this.”
I am beginning to think this might be an excellent position on the issue. Certainly, it has a degree of internal consistency that a lot of other positions lack. And while infertility can be devastating and tragic, the morality of an action has little or nothing to do with how desperately you want something to happen. Which I think is Andrea’s point.
What then about fertility drugs? They enhance a couple’s fertility without replacing the need for conjugal relations. However, they not infrequently cause multiple embryos to be conceived, leading us straight back into sticky medical/ethical territory.
I have no idea where the Catholic Church stands on fertility drugs. I’m just not convinced that insisting on a conjugal relationship between the parents is enough to get around the various ethical issues involved in fertility treatment.