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Polygamy bust opens debate

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Andrea has an op-ed on polygamy in the Sun today. Read it here. My favourite part:

From prehistoric times until the late 20th century, marriage was understood as a child-centred institution between one man and one woman, for life.

Though you’d be hard pressed to find this view on any university campus, marriage served to protect women and children, chiefly by obliging men to stick around to help raise them. (Sex was confined to marriage so any resulting children were identifiably linked to both parents–finally both men and women were held responsible.)

Today, marriage is chiefly based on love and weddings are an opportunity to have a party. We (well, the Supreme Court) already agreed marriage should not be limited by sexual orientation.

What justification is there now to limit the number of partners?

We already collectively accepted it needn’t be for life and it needn’t be between members of the opposite sex. If you are against polygamy, but in favour of same sex marriage, you’re between a rock and a hard place.

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Rebecca adds: As to whether or not the care, legitimization and support of children is the prime role of marriage, nobody has explained it better than David Blankenhorn in his magisterial book The Future of Marriage. Yes, the details have varied, and yes, virtually all societies have recognized marriages that did not, or could not, involve procreation, but the essence of marriage is to create a functional context in which to produce the next generation.

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Andrea adds: Blankenhorn makes this comparison to highlight his point–he says that not everyone buys a car to drive it, but that doesn’t mean cars aren’t primarily meant for driving. Some people, it’s true, they only collect cars. But because that is true, we’d never say that there’s no connection between cars and driving. (I’m paraphrasing.)

I also just read this in Marriage and Caste in America: “…no culture has ever designed a model of fatherhood without matrimony.” When we separate child bearing from marriage (and this is not to say that every married couple absolutely must have kids–just that kids ought to have married parents) it is an unprecedented experiment.

Well. Now at least we know.

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A chilling piece in today’s Toronto Star. GTA’s secret world of polygamy:

Polygamy is happening in Toronto; it’s not common, but it’s happening,” said [Aly] Hindy, imam at Salahuddin Islamic Centre.

Hindy, hardly a stranger to controversy, is well known for his friendship with the family of Omar Khadr, the young Canadian detainee at Guantanamo Bay, and his outspoken views on the implementation of Islamic law. In the past five years, Hindy said he has officiated or “blessed” more than 30 polygamous marriages; the most recent was two months ago. Even some imams in the GTA have second wives, he added.

“This is in our religion and nobody can force us to do anything against our religion,” he said. “If the laws of the country conflict with Islamic law, if one goes against the other, then I am going to follow Islamic law, simple as that.”

How much you wanna bet nobody forces him to choose?

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Rebecca adds: This is illegal, right? Is he not admitting to breaking the law by marrying people who are already married? 

Shall we take bets on how long until he’s arrested? [cue crickets chirping]

 

Trying to lift the mood…

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I know the news out of the UK isn’t uplifting today. That human-animal hybrid thing is certainly bad – though in many ways, not surprising. So I thought I’d go looking for fun stories to act, you know, as counterbalance. I’m afraid I was only mildly successful…

The Merry Wives Cafe, located in Hilldale, Utah, is owned and operated by polygamist group members with a sense of business, humor and public relations. The cafe opened last year to give locals and travelers a place to eat. The owners also opened it as a way to gently confront polygamy’s battered image. It is not immediately obvious that the cafe has any connection to polygamy, though to sharp diners, there are clues.

“We’re not trying to shove [polygamy] in people’s faces,” says manager Cherise Dutson. “But, this is how we live, and it’s our heritage.”

Diners looking closely at the decades-old family portraits on the café walls will notice a common theme: a single patriarch, multiple wives and multitudes of kids.

And then there’s the café’s name and logo. “The Merry Wives” is borrowed from Shakespeare, and the logo depicts three cooks, all women and, presumably, plural wives.

[h/t iMAPP]

Who’s laughing now?

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Remember when we were debating same-sex marriage some of us tried to point out that once you start messing with the definition of marriage there’s no telling where it’ll end? That polygamy would be next? Because once you decide that a marriage is simply the recognition of a loving relationship, there’s no reason to get hung up on the number of people involved in said loving relationship?

I remember. We were laughed at. We were told tut-tut, of course not, because polygamy is illegal.

Oh yeah?

Hundreds of GTA Muslim men in polygamous marriages — some with a harem of wives — are receiving welfare and social benefits for each of their spouses, thanks to the city and province, Muslim leaders say.

Mumtaz Ali, president of the Canadian Society of Muslims, said wives in polygamous marriages are recognized as spouses under the Ontario Family Law Act, providing they were legally married under Muslim laws abroad.

“Polygamy is a regular part of life for many Muslims,” Ali said yesterday. “Ontario recognizes religious marriages for Muslims and others.”

[…]

However, city and provincial officials said legally a welfare applicant can claim only one spouse. Other adults living in the same household can apply for welfare independently.

Once again, I wonder where the feminists are… Why aren’t they up in arms about this? Do they think polygamy is good for women?

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Andrea adds: If I had a dime for every time a social liberal or even a libertarian told me family and marriage policy doesn’t matter, I’d be retired in Waikiki. Social liberals appear to be AOK with an illogical double standard: Yes to same sex marriage, no to polygamy (though clearly we have not said no to that at all). And my libertarian friends? With some of their attitudes toward marriage-one almost has to wonder whether they don’t secretly long for bigger government.  

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Rebecca adds: “‘Polygamy is a regular part of life for many Muslims,’ Ali said yesterday.”

No kidding. Lots of things are a regular part of life for many Muslims, but it doesn’t follow that we want these behaviours replicated in Canada, much less at taxpayer expense. Maybe we should jump on the Rowan Williams bandwagon and declare sharia in Canada inevitable?

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