“Women who refuse sex on first date ‘increase chances of finding a good man'”
Researchers used a mathematical model to show that more reliable men were willing to wait longer before having sex for the first time. By contrast, less suitable men were not as likely to continue dating.
The researchers used a mathematical model. They could have also asked any of our grandmothers, thereby saving money, time and effort.
(h/t Sobering Thoughts)
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Brigitte is about ready to go put on hair curlers (no wait, I no longer need them): It’s been a while since I’ve sampled the dating scene (thank goodness), but isn’t the headline on that story a little crass? Whadayamean, ‘refuse sex’? Is having sex on the first date now something that’s expected unless ‘refused’? Am I missing something?
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Rebecca adds: What about guys who “refuse sex” on the first date? Those would be worth hanging on to, one would imagine.
Strange world we’re living in.
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Andrea adds…that there’s really only one way to find out if a guy refuses sex on the first date, and it involves, er, throwing “oneself” on him. Said guy-worth-keeping will be repulsed, and likely won’t enjoy hearing “but I was only testing you!” In short, a lose-lose for the single girls in the crowd. Someone else will have to conduct this important experiment. Maybe there’s a mathematical model…
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Wow, this sure brings a whole new meaning to playing hard to get. Yes, I am sure that if you just hold out for one date he will see that you are a self respecting woman and will want to propose marriage much sooner than if you had given in on the first date.
It makes me crazy that people feel they need to research things like this…but if that’s what it takes to make people listen…
And, P.S., I always thought conventional wisdom was “don’t KISS on the first date”…I thought not sleeping with someone on the first date went without saying? Apparently not…
I remember this exact same advice being tossed around c. 1985 by the otherwise casual-sex-friendly fashions magazines I read in my youth. It’s also been featured advice in self-help books that advise on how to catch a man since such books started coming on the market. But no doubt plenty of people will be happy to have this serious research to back up what really seems like common sense. (Though of course, it’s only good advice assuming the woman WANTS a long term relationship. If she’s just after the casual sex as well, she may as well grab it while she can.)
And is anyone else a bit weirded out by terms like “mating” and “strategy” that are used in this article? Makes forming a relationship seem like an awfully utilitarian venture.
Assuming this “study” is conducted by economists what about the 2nd, 3rd, 4th ….. dates? A declining marginal utility curve? No doubt this headline will make it into comedy routines.