I am slightly ticked off by this piece (just so you know: if you follow all the links some of them will show girls in bikinis). I get it to some extent (i.e. men do not want their girls to look like men – fair enough; I don’t want my men to look like girls). But to come down so hard on the Miss America contestants for having toned physiques is perhaps a touch exaggerated. We can’t all look like this…

True, I am biased. I’ve always exercised, and I’ve always enjoyed being fit and as much on the slim side as I can manage. I’m coming up to ten years in the same dojo (traditional karate). I don’t have Ms. Holloway’s hips but honestly I don’t want them either. I prefer to have curves that are more discreet but decent muscle underneath. Because you know what? After a while (not that I’m looking at any calendar in particular), without exercise, those nice curves just kinda fall apart on you. Also? Being trained in some kind of martial arts means you’re equipped to wallop the first clown who shows up behind you intending to whack your pretty little head with a hammer. It also helps you handle more, ah, serious weapons. Not much point being armed if you’re not strong enough to control the thing.

So. By all means let’s try to keep looking like girls. No, it’s not necessary to look like you’re headed for the body building competition. But come on. Abs on a girl are not necessarily ugly.

[h/t]

_____________________
Véronique adds: I don’t do karate, I run. I run two half marathons a year. (If one-and-a-half years makes a habit.) Last week, as I was leaving work to go for a run, my darling co-worker printed out the sketch of the “hammer dude” so I could get familiar with his face. Maybe I could outrun him, if it was at the beginning of my run and he was drunk. Running will get you some nice legs and burn some fat (assuming you don’t reward yourself with a Starbuck’s Trenta with a cup of whip on top). But it won’t help you wallop clowns.
Recently at home was our annual “Vero starts the generator day” to make sure I can survive when my husband is away. And sure enough, I have great running legs and cardio-pulmonary capacity but not enough raw power to crank-up the genny. So if looking like a guy means that you can survive hammer attacks and crippling blizzards, I say “bring it on”.

____________________

Andrea adds: There must be something wrong with me. I looked at the links above and whether said blogger was criticizing or applauding, all I saw was beautiful woman after beautiful woman. I have issues with bikinis and high heels though. It’s just not practical.

Look, I’m not against breast-feeding. Not at all. It’s great if that’s your thing. I’m not even that squeamish about lactating in public (though not very wild about it either). But this is pushing it.

The Wisconsin Bang variety is “deliciously creamy,” City Funk has a “dizzying sweet finish,” and Sweet Air Equity is a “mild, hard cheese that crumbles in your mouth.” The fromage connoisseur might salivate at these tantalizing descriptions, but for those who know the key ingredient — human breast milk — these culinary accounts elicit everything from curiosity to utter disgust.

To New Yorker Miriam Simun, a breast-milk cheese-maker who recently served up the creations as part of a university project, the question is: To eat or not to eat. We consume breast milk as a baby, so why not spread it on a baguette as an adult? We consume cow’s cheese, so why not sink our teeth into cheese coagulated from human milk?

A new decade, a new kind of creepy crime:

A California man faces six years in prison for using personal information found on women’s Facebook profiles to take over their e-mail accounts, steal nude pictures of them and sometimes even blackmail them. One victim likened it to “virtual rape.”

George Samuel Bronk pleaded guilty in Sacramento Superior Court Thursday to seven felony charges, including computer intrusion, impersonation and possession of child pornography.

The charges stem from a nine-month period ending in September, during which Bronk hijacked the e-mail accounts of hundreds of women across 17 states and in England, the Sacramento Bee reported.

A press release from the office of Kamala Harris, California’s attorney general, says Bronk targeted his victims by searching Facebook for women who posted both their e-mail addresses and also personal information such as their favorite foods, their father’s middle names, their high-school mascots and their favorite colors.

Such details are routinely used in “identity challenges” when changes are made to online personal accounts. “Social engineering” scams, such as phishing scams, are designed to trick the victim into revealing this sort of information — but Bronk found it all right there on Facebook.

With it, Bronk could pose as a legitimate e-mail user, hit the “Forgot your password?” button, pass the identity challenge, change the password to one of his own and take over the e-mail account, locking out the victim.

And then the problems would begin.

Bronk, 23, searched hundreds of “sent mail” folders for any nude photographs or videos.  If he found any, he’d often sending the most scandalous or pornographic pictures to the women’s contacts lists, or would contact the victims directly and threaten to make the pictures public unless they sent him even more revealing ones.

In some cases, he’d go back for seconds. After he’d taken over an e-mail account, he’d e-mail Facebook from it and tell the company he’d forgotten the victim’s Facebook password — and then take over the woman’s Facebook account as well.

In October, when police confiscated Bronk’s computer and arrested him, they found more than 170 files of explicit photographs stolen from e-mail accounts he had hijacked.

Here’s the part I *really* don’t get: Why do people keep nude and/or explicit pictures of themselves on web-based servers? Are they trying to get in trouble? I don’t know about you, but my sympathy switch is broken. If you’re going to post explicit pictures of yourself online, you deserve to be embarrassed publicly.

What is it about women feeling like they must be perfect all the time?

Almost one-quarter of mothers admit they cover up how much television their kids watch, and one in five lie about how long they spend playing with their kids, according to a new survey of 5,000 people by website Netmums. Mothers often make each other feel “inadequate,” it notes, and the pressure to seem like a perfect parent leads many to lie. Almost two-thirds of moms also said they’d told white lies to other mothers about how well they were coping, and almost half cover up financial concerns. More than nine out of 10 admitted they compare themselves to other mothers.

What if we just chilled a bit and realized that having kids isn’t perfect and we don’t need to be, either?

The federal government is looking for ways to stop honour killings in Canada.

TORONTO — They are disturbing stories of fathers trying to kill their daughters, of brothers murdering their sisters.

Long prevalent in certain Muslim, Hindu and Sikh cultures in South Asia and the Middle East, “honour killings” have increasingly been making headlines in Canada in recent years.

Now, the federal government is urging more community groups to come forward to help fight the rise of such crimes.

Status of Women Minister Rona Ambrose first called for a pitch from organizations for projects targeting this type of violence in July.

Since then, the department has received a couple of dozen formal applications but says it still has more funding that can be put toward helping eradicate these “intolerable” acts.

Women still don’t know much about baby-making… That’s the conclusion I get from an otherwise very long and tediously non-judgmental article on egg freezing.

Women are born with a finite number of eggs. At birth a woman’s ovaries contain approximately one to two million oocytes — immature eggs; by puberty, the count drops to 400,000. During each menstrual cycle, about 1,000 oocytes begin to develop but only one becomes a mature egg. The others left behind die. Not only does the supply shrink but egg quality decreases over time as well, since the best eggs are used up when young, so that each egg now offers less chance of pregnancy and a higher risk of miscarriage.

By the time a woman reaches age 39, “there aren’t many (follicles) left that have got enough strength to raise their hand,” says Dr. Al Yuzpe, co-founder and co-director of the Genesis Fertility Centre of Vancouver.

“My usual response is, ‘You may not look 40, you may not feel 40 but your ovaries don’t know it,’ ” Yuzpe says. He frequently encounters women who had no idea of the limits of their fertility. “They’re not only shocked, they’re tearful, they’re angry. ‘Nobody told me that I wasn’t going to be able to get pregnant at 48.’ ”

I don’t expect everyone to know every detail about the production of eggs in female humans. And I speak as someone who knows fairly little, beyond the basics. But I always knew that if I waited too long, I wouldn’t be able to have children. What do you mean, nobody told you that you weren’t going to be able to get pregnant at 48? There’s not much point “educating” people who just won’t listen.

I will make no comment…

LONDON — Feeding solid food earlier and not relying solely on breastfeeding for the first six months might benefit babies, a team of researchers say in a new study.

Waiting to wean a baby could increase the occurrence of food allergies and iron deficiency, the BBC reported, citing the study in the British Medical Journal.

The researchers said weaning could begin as early as four months, instead of the current recommendation of six months adopted by many countries, the BBC report said.

The World Health Organization issued the six months guideline nearly a decade ago, and the research team said this recommendation should stand for mothers in developing nations, as access to clean water and appropriate baby food can be limited.

“When you look at the figures, there are a lot of babies being weaned before six months anyway – and that’s probably the most important thing in terms of hard evidence,” lead researcher Dr. Mary Fewtrell, of the University of London Institute of Child Health, was quoted as saying by the BBC.

We don’t exactly shy away from highlighting abuses of women and young girls in Afghanistan. (See a sample of stories here.) The more I learn about the socio-political culture of that country, the less I like it. And I wasn’t wild about the place to begin with. I blame the multiculturalists for trying to get the rest of us to ignore egregious abuse in the name of – oh, does it matter why they do it? I don’t think so.

Older, powerful men boosted their social status by keeping boys as sexual playthings and the practice was celebrated in song and dance, a military study claimed.

“To dismiss the existence of this dynamic out of desire to avoid western discomfort is to risk failing to comprehend an essential social force underlying Pashtun culture,” the report said.

British officers in Helmand requested the study to help them understand the sexual behaviour of locals and Afghan comrades after young soldiers became uneasy they were being propositioned.

American social scientists employed to help troops understand the local culture reported that homosexual sex was widespread among the Pashtun ethnic group in southern Afghanistan.

Strict separation of men and women, coupled with poverty and the significant expense of getting married, contributed to young men turning to each other for sexual companionship.

The study, called ‘Pashtun Sexuality’, said that as well as willing sex between young men, “boys are appreciated for physical beauty and apprenticed to older men for their sexual initiation”.

The practice of ‘bache bazi’ or boy play, is known throughout Afghanistan, but is particularly renowned in the city of Kandahar next to Helmand, where prepubescent boys are widely admired.

Western soldiers often report feeling unease at the attentions of their Afghan comrades, who are affectionate with each other and sometimes wear make-up.

British troops have also talked of their disgust at police or militias keeping young boys as hangers on.

Look. I don’t care what people who are over the age of sexual consent do willingly. But the business with the kids is not something Western troops (and Western citizens in whose names the troops do their work) should tolerate. Full stop.

Unhappy news in the U.S.:

NEW YORK — The long-term decline in the U.S. abortion rate stalled as the recession took hold, according to the latest comprehensive survey of America’s abortion providers.

The Guttmacher Institute, which periodically surveys U.S. abortion providers, reported Tuesday that there were 1.21 million abortions in 2008 and a rate of 19.6 abortions per 1,000 women aged 15-44.

Both figures were up slightly from the previous 2005 survey, ending a steady decline since 1990, when U.S. abortions peaked at 1.6 million and the abortion rate was 27.4.

And in China:

While comprehensive data are hard to come by, official figures show abortions are increasing, and Chinese media and experts say many, if not most, of the abortion-seekers are young, single women.

That’s a change from the past, when abortion was used mainly to enforce the government’s one child per couple limit. Today, students are clearly a client base: The Beijing Modern Women’s Hospital offers a government-subsidized “Safe & Easy A+” discount abortion package at 880 yuan ($130). Others advertise in college handbooks.

According to a government tally, 9.2 million abortions were performed in 2008, up from 7.6 million in 2007. But the count only includes hospitals, and state media report the total could be as high as 13 million. If accurate, that would give China among the highest abortion rates in the world.

Nobody with their heart in the right place can be happy to read these stories. What horrible, senseless waste of human potential. If we cared half as much about the lives of those mothers and babies as we care about the lives of spotted owls and bald eagles, the world would be a much better place.

There’s a story on CNN about how women can get ahead in the workplace. I especially like rules 1 and 8:

1. Quit thinking the workplace is fair

[…] The reality is that gender matters, says professor Sheila Wellington, who teaches the course “Women in Business Leadership” at New York University’s Stern School of Business.

She says one of the most common mistakes women make is believing the playing field is equal. “They have it in their minds that it doesn’t matter if I’m a woman.”

By acknowledging the barriers ahead such as the difficulties of reintegrating into the work force after having a child, women can better plan their careers. Wellington also pointed out some managers still believe women may not work as hard or put in as many hours. A woman can overcome this assumption by putting herself forward and offering to do more work.

8. The way you look and talk matters

Your attire and speaking skills affect how others perceive you, and it’s nothing personal.

Author and psychologist Lois P. Frankel says company cultures may vary, but proper workplace etiquette is essential for landing the next big job. Frankel advises young women to look to how successful senior female managers dress and emulate that style.

When women communicate, they should stick with simple but confident sentences. The more words used, the softer the message sounds, Frankel says. Women can also practice short speeches at home to help push their main ideas to the beginning.

Maybe you think the workplace ought to be more fair. It doesn’t matter what you think. So you have to work harder to prove yourself? Do it. If you care about the job, why wouldn’t you? But I especially like the last point about looks (and language). Please, girls, do yourselves a favour and dress for the office, not the club. Showing too much skin (even when you’re really good looking) hurts your career prospects. When in doubt, cover that cleavage a bit… (hint: if we can see all the way down to your bra without effort when you bend forward a little bit, your shirt is too revealing).

The other points are worth reading, too.

________________________

Véronique adds: I especially liked  4. Don’t ever, ever cry at work. My husband ran a company with only men for about 6 years before a couple of women joined their ranks and he was floored by the hand-holding he had to do (figuratively speaking of course). Ladies, get a grip.

_______________________

Andrea adds: I’ve been away, so I’m late adding this. Just wanted to say that I’ve had to “hold men’s hands” in the past too. Don’t mean to make this tit for tat, but it’s worth mentioning. Every person is different. Finally, though I have fortunately never cried at work (I have come dangerously close) I don’t think this is a cardinal sin, depending on how/why it happens. If a couple of tears fall and you ignore them and move ahead, I’d say that’s just fine. If you cry and expect people (your manager) to care, that’s a problem.