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On Mother’s Day

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I found this lovely little reflection from Alice von Hildebrand, which I thought would allow for saying Happy Mother’s Day to just about everyone. The idea is that we all have a role to play. We put a lot of emphasis on biological mothering, all of us, perhaps non-religious folks most of all. Hence the drive to IVF, for example. If we think more broadly about the term, and the need for mentors and spiritual mothers, then it takes a lot of pressure off.

I never had the incredible privilege of having children of my own, yet last year I was bombarded with Mother’s Day cards and wishes. If you don’t have children, for goodness sake don’t believe that you have to give up motherhood.

Motherhood is not only biological maternity. It is spiritual maternity. There are hundreds of people all around who are desperately looking for a mother. A number of people have come to me to tell me about their problems. I listen to them. And I love them. And I say very little. But they know that I care for them. In this sense, I have become their mother….

Spiritual motherhood is more important than biological motherhood. There are plenty of women who are biological mothers and yet are not mothers at all. Some consider their child to be a nuisance and an accident, saying “I didn’t want it.” Take for instance women who have an abortion for convenience’s sake. God offers them a tremendous gift but they say, “No, I don’t want it; it’s going to disturb me.”

From now on your daily prayer should be, “God, send me spiritual children and I will never turn any one of them down. The more the better.” Simple as that. Pray for the gift of spiritual children. It might very well be that in your beautiful desire to be a biological mother you have overlooked cases where you could have become a spiritual mother. Many of my students became my spiritual children, even though they were young adults already.

The Handmaid’s Tale

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I’m genuinely interested in reading The Handmaid’s Tale and only then seeing the movie. Which is to say it may be a while before I can actually comment on the movie. I gather it’s a dystopian book/film in which women are forced to bear children for others at the hands of  religious (Christian?) authoritarians.

The reality is that secularism is demanding a new subordination of women. Doctors are calling for payments to be legal in Canada for reproductive material–eggs, sperm and for surrogates.

As it is, many people in Canada wait indefinitely to have children, resort to reproductive tourism in other countries or import eggs and sperm from the United States, where compensating donors is legal, the group says. Canadians are at a disadvantage “in terms of managing their own fertility care,” said Sherry Levitan, a lawyer and member of the society’s board.

The article discusses how very few women are willing to be donors or surrogates simply out of altruism (duh) so this kind of activity will need to be coerced via payments. I see this as a call for a new dystopia, where women who have no money are compelled to sell their bodies and/or parts for those who do have money but no children.

Watch Breeders, people, before we walk this path. Men can donate sperm endlessly at virtually no cost to their own health, but this is absolutely not true for women. Having children cannot be commercialized.

March for Life Ottawa photos

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The March for Life today went well–the people covered the Hill, which is no small feat. Even relatively large protests can look small up there. I won’t hazard a guess about numbers-the eternal debate. (It was more! It was fewer! I don’t really care that much–a sizeable group showed and it’s encouraging to see.) The anarchists running in were scary, and yes, they had more than one hammer and sickle on display. I didn’t manage a photo of this, but one tiny, fearless Philippino lady walked right up to them with her sign and a smile on her face and then kept right on walking. All in all, a good march.

Crisis Pregnancy Centres (CPCs)

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If you want an abortion in Canada, there’s no need for counselling or a referral. You simply go and get one and this happens for about one in four pregnancies in Canada today.

If, however, you are experiencing conflict about an unplanned pregnancy, you may decide to get help from a Crisis Pregnancy Centre. These are the only places that pay attention to you, help you think through your decision and offer support. These centres are under attack these days because they don’t refer for abortion, which honestly, if you are in a CPC you already knew you didn’t need an abortion referral (and the other side likes to talk about how pro-lifers do not trust women). So some people want them to be shut down.

Pat Maloney of Run With Life has written a rebuttal to some of the more egregious attacks. It’s here.

If we pretend to be pro-choice in this country, then we need to defund abortion and ensure that this kind of counselling remains available. Until we defund abortion, we are not pro-choice–we are placing an economic incentive on abortion and making it easier/more accessible. Some people need counselling and benefit from it, and to borrow a phrase from the pro-choice movement, “if you are against this kind of counselling just don’t go get it–ha!” (And no, not every centre is perfect; they are staffed by human beings, after all. But they offer a service to their communities and countless times I’ve been happy to refer to our local centre, First Place Options.)

 

Research to help with infertility

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Ottawa’s own Dr. Leiva was featured in a TIME magazine article about ovulation kits very recently. Dr. Leiva has and is helping advance the cause of women’s health and the struggle with infertility through his research, of which he has done quite a lot. This is important because there is not enough work done to help women understand their own fertility and their own cycles particularly as concerns infertility. Now Dr. Leiva wants to bring a urinary ovulation confirmation test to Canada.

From Dr. Leiva:

Approximately one in six couples in Ontario have experienced infertility at some point in their lives. Infertility can cause extreme emotional, physical and financial burden to those who experience it. However, forty percent of couples who seek infertility services conceive without treatment. To improve a couple’s chance for conceiving naturally, it is necessary to confirm when ovulation occurs. Confirmation that ovulation has occurred can only be done by performing a blood test for serum progesterone test or by serial transvaginal ultrasound. However, both of these investigations require visits to a physician, specialized laboratory testing, and in the case of ultrasound high costs and logistical demands. A simple home-based pregnanediol-3a-glucuronide (PdG) urinary test to confirm ovulation has been developed but is not yet approved for use in Canada. The PdG urinary test works by measuring urine for a marker of Progesterone, which is a hormone that rises sharply only after ovulation. If shown to be as effective in confirming ovulation, this test would provide much more convenient way for women and clinicians to confirm ovulation and determine fertility bringing great empowerment to couples.

So what’s my point with this post? Dr. Leiva is seeking $15,000 to do this small study to advance the cause of bringing this ovulation kit to Canada. He is working with the Bruyère Foundation, which is a registered Canadian charity and they are happy to issue tax receipts for all donations over $10.

When making a donation whether online, phone or mail; it is very important to write or mention to be assigned to “Fertility Study/Dr. Rene Leiva”

Please donate. And let others know about this cause. It’s very worthwhile, advancing women’s health in Canada.

If you have questions about this, please message me and I can find out and/or put you in touch with Dr. Leiva for more information.

Hurray for good research!

CPSO Legal Challenge Opportunity to Give

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Another opportunity to give. I’m just going to cut and paste the Physicians for Life letter in full. I simply cannot begin to think of living in a province that tells physicians they must go against good treatment principles, their conscience and ethical behaviour and provide things like assisted suicide and euthanasia. So let’s not think about that, and remember that even if this is a David and Goliath struggle (and it is), tis David who won! 

 

Dear Supporters,
 
Three organizations and five brave physicians have launched legal proceedings against the College of Physicians and Surgeons of Ontario in response to its conscience rights-violating policies.
 
The three organizations are Canadian Physicians for Life, the Christian Medical and Dental Society (CMDS), and the Canadian Federation of Catholic Physicians’ Societies (CFCPS).
 
CMDS is a Christian association of physicians, dentists, and students who seek to honour God by integrating faith with professional practice. The CFCPS seeks to promote the teaching of the Catholic Church as applied in the provision of health care and to contribute to the development of public policy. Canadian Physicians for Life is a secular organization, gathering physicians from all backgrounds and specialties, to build a culture of life in Canada by equipping pro-life medical students, supporting physicians in their life-affirming practices, and educating Canadians about these issues.
 
While our purposes are different, we share common concerns about the protection of human life. It is because of this shared concern that we are collaborating to address an urgent issue.
 
We found out yesterday that we need to raise $120,000 by June to cover the costs of the legal proceedings against the CPSO.

We are stronger together in this fight. We’re working together in asking our memberships to pool funds for pro-conscience rights initiatives like this one.

The CPSO has been very aggressively defending this case; I saw that firsthand when I was cross-examined on behalf of Canadian Physicians for Life in March. This is a David and Goliath situation. In addition to fighting the CPSO, we are also fighting the Attorney General of Ontario, who has come alongside the CPSO to defend its policies. The CPSO and the Attorney General of Ontario have far greater resources than we do to fight this battle, but it is our doctors and med students who simply cannot afford to lose this case.

The organizations involved in the case will be fundraising over the next week. We appeal to you, our members, to play a vital role in this collaboration. 

Please make a gift to CPL today to support our collaborative work during this urgent time.

Faye Sonier

Executive Director & General Legal Counsel

Support CPL or any of the organizations fighting this challenge. All are good, worthy organizations.

Canadian Memorial for the Unborn

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The Canadian Memorial for the Unborn is well on its way to becoming a reality. Don’t be misled because PWPL is an anti-abortion website, the memorial is for women who have experienced pregnancy loss of any kind, be it abortion or miscarriage. This kind of loss lives in the shadowlands for many. The creation of a memorial not only helps others understand that these losses are real, it of course offers a place for anyone to come and sit, reflect, pray, mourn or remember. 

This initiative is well on its way to becoming a reality–but it’s not quite there yet. This is where YOU come in–you can help make this beautiful statue, which will be placed somewhere, most likely in Ottawa, a reality by donating some money. They need to raise a mere $10, 500 more. 

Help if you can. Abortion and miscarriage are far too common and in our busy lives, creating a beautiful space where we recognize the loss will help people heal. 

The Canadian Memorial for the Unborn

 

Mike Pence and his dining habits

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Oh thank goodness. This column by Barbara Kay is exactly the response everyone needed to Ashley Csanady, National Post columnist, who calls herself a reporter.

Csanady recently wrote that VP Mike Pence was perpetuating “rape culture” by not dining alone with women who are not his wife. Right. 

For the record, I have worked with men who have strict rules about what they will and will not do with women who are not their wives. These rules included but were not limited to not travelling solo with a woman. I have also worked in totally secular environments with men with no such standards. My personal (survey of one) record: uncomfortable moments with men conducting themselves inappropriately come to a tally of two in secular environments. The tally is zero in the Christian environments, plus they promoted me to management. Not exactly what anyone can call sexism. 

What we need here is dialogue. I’ve found myself having cordial conversations on Facebook with friends who think that Mike Pence thinks women are all sexual objects. I have explained that Mike Pence has these rules not because he views women as sexual objects, but rather because he views himself as a sinful man; he sees family culture is not thriving, there are so many mistakes made that lead to family breakdown which is totally painful and completely avoidable, so he takes steps to ensure this doesn’t happen to him and furthermore, that he is above reproach. 

Hats off to Mike Pence and all the other men like him. They are reaping their reward in a happy family life–which is not something that can be said of everyone today, sadly.   

This whole discussion reminds me of the Party of One song from the new Muppets–when she dines alone. One of my faves.

Indeed, the pro-choice memoir we all need

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I read this piece and thought, yes, it’s the pro-choice memoir we all need right now. I actually agree with the Globe and Mail writer, Denise Balkissoon. 

The hallmark of the abortion movement can never be compassion to the child. It will never be that. Abortions take the life of that child without asking, without concern and without anesthetic. That’s why the start of this column is most curious: 

A pregnant teenager learns that the fetus she is carrying will be born without a functioning circulatory system. At no point will it be able to breathe for itself – there is no way that it can live. The teenager decides not to terminate the pregnancy, telling her obstetrician that she is “praying for a miracle.”

Twenty weeks later, the teenager gives birth. In a new memoir, the doctor, Willie Parker, writes of his “horror” watching the newborn’s immediate, inevitable death. “Born at term, the baby could feel pain … ” Dr. Parker writes. “She must have felt all the anxiety and panic that would accompany suffocating to death.

“In this case, an absolute reverence for life led to a situation that, to my eyes, consisted of nothing less than pure cruelty.”

Pro-choice people ask us to swap the cruelty we can see for the cruelty we can’t see. There is no evidence that taking the life of the unborn child in the womb is less cruel. The result, after all, is exactly the same, it’s just we saw a little bit less. 

When I miscarried at nine weeks, the hands of this new person were clearly evident. Tiny, perfect fingers, thin, transluscent. Real. Hands like the ones I’m using to type right now. 

So bring on the memoirs that describe how and when a man draws his line in the sand about when he can end the life of a baby versus when he can’t. It gets us all talking about the reality that is abortion. Killing kids ain’t no form of compassion–and that’s all the pro-choice movement has. That’s what they defend. I’ll wait for a miracle any day of the week. And hope for a doctor who isn’t negligent in providing pain relief after birth, if such a thing is sadly needed. 

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